Viewpoint | Value added women

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As women we feel as though we are in constant struggle to validate ourselves to men, society, and fit into a male composed stereotype of what the woman is supposed to be like. There is a tik-tok post of a beautiful young woman exerting herself on what a man means when he asks a woman what she is bringing to the table. The sister attacks six-figure earning women as believing that their high earning capacity is all they believe matters and that men will easily bypass “her six-figure earning a$$” for a woman who stratifies the stereotypical perception of a woman’s role.

The man wants things such as a woman he doesn’t have to fight with, a woman who will build him, pray with him, support him, and such like. The impression the sister gives is as though the six-figure earning sister is devoid of such qualities. Having qualified herself to a level and achieved a position of some financial or high earning capacity she automatically does not possess the skills to make her man feel worthy and to stay by her size.

Whereas the sister notes some good characteristics in any relationship suggesting that a man’s needs are very basic and discernable this is not universal. Both males and females, regardless of physical or other characteristics, vary in what they are prepared to accept and compromise for a relationship to work. Many relationships do not reveal the true character of either party at the inception and very often persons fall for what is physically appealing in order to get the person in a more intimate manner.

The emotional strength, support, etc., that our beautiful sister speaks of in the real world is not more important whether addressed or not, recognised or not, as the six-figure earnings which can make a difference, in many relationships. The six-figure woman is a help mate who can provide love, comfort, and emotional support. She is not incapable of praying with her man, fighting with her man, building with her man, and comforting him as needed.


Any relationship calls for balance. Men don’t only leave six-figure women to find women on the lower financial rung for comfort etc, they also leave women on the lower financial rung looking up to find a helpmate who can provide a more rounded relationship with financial stability. Men will leave any woman for whatever needs he can best satisfy elsewhere. Sometimes it’s only heavy commitment and financial reasons that will keep him physically present, but otherwise absent.

Lots of men support the sister even though she does come over a bit envious of six-figure women. After all, a six-figure (U.S) earning woman is not the average woman and they are likely to be more educated, and certainly more successful in whatever their business or trade. They have something that some beautiful and or homey sisters don’t have and can also be a combination of all three, that is, beautiful, homey and six-figured when they kick off their working attire.

Why therefore should we believe that a man asking a woman what she brings to the table does not also mean what her financial contributions are? Why wouldn’t a successful or unsuccessful man want to know of his financial obligations when he decides to get involved with any woman, (unless he is earning very high six- figure or millions)? What’s her earning to debt ratio? How much outstanding school loans does she have and is she going to be a financial burden, liability or asset?

In the USA her credit score may be deserving of scrutiny, this being very important to determine whether they could make financial investments such as buying a car, owning a home, etc. The financially astute will be concerned whether a partnership with her will live his stature or create more deficits and hard times. Happiness in a relationship is not merely the absence of fights but the resolution, understanding, growth and insights gained from each battle.

Men and women should see the six-figure woman just as capable of caring, being able to multitask, a capable woman coming to the table “Value Added.” Men and women instead of finding her as somewhat snotty and a challenge, should respect her, her views, her sacrifices, and journey to get what she has. Treat her not as a piece but as a progressive equal partner in the family business of life they seek to form with her. Partnerships are complex issues and balance is important.

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