Dear Editor,
Gender-based Violence (GBV) continues to be one of the most pervasive and devastating human rights violations across the globe. In the Caribbean, it cuts across borders through generational trauma, culture, and socio-economic levels. Globally, one in three women and girls will experience physical or sexual violence in their lifetime, a statistic so staggering that it demands change.
Minister of Education Hon. Priya Manickchand, in launching her 16 Days of Activism for the Elimination of Violence Against Women, captured the reality of abuse in her daily video series on GBV. “You’re ugly. You’re fat. You are worth nothing without me… you’re stupid.” These are not just harsh words; they are weapons. “Those are all ways men can abuse women,” she emphasized, reminding the public that violence does not begin with fists—it begins with words.
This year, the conversations on GBV feel louder, more honest, more brave, and more widespread than ever before. We are seeing messages on GBV coming from schools, the business sector, community leaders, faith-based organisations, and many others. Every post, video, and testimony shared online proves that we need the next generation to challenge harmful gender norms and break the cycle so that all forms of abuse can be prevented.
Much of the public conversation on GBV focuses on physical violence – and rightly so, because physical abuse is the most visible and often the most dangerous form. However, physical violence is usually the final stage in a long pattern of behaviours designed to break someone down. Before the first slap, hit, cuff, choke, or unwanted touch, there were insults, intimidation, controlling behaviour, isolation, threats, ridicule, shaming, stalking, and financial restriction. These forms of non-physical abuse are often overlooked and normalized.
In the beginning of many relationships, partners often say, “I love you so much, I would do anything for you.” Lovely, isn’t it? But as the years pass and you build a life together, the real question becomes: Do you show up for each other? Do you put your phone down when they are talking about their day? Do you take their hand when walking down the street or sitting in the car? Do you notice when they come home from work and their mood is a bit off? Do you take the time to ask them about it? Do you remember the little things they tell you, things that show you still care?
Love is a feeling that must be followed by action. It can be healthy. It can be worth it, with the right words and care. It can create an incredible connection, not just for both partners, but for your children, who mirror what they watch, listen to, and eventually become. It’s about showing up for each other every day in the smallest ways.
When a partner says, “No one else will want you,” it is not insecurity, it is control. When they say, “I’m only trying to protect you; that’s why you shouldn’t have friends,” it is not love, it is isolation. When they monitor calls, messages, or movement under the guise of “checking in,” it is not care, it is surveillance.
These early signs are often dismissed, especially among young people who may confuse controlling behaviour with affection. This is why the increase in public discussions about GBV is so important. Awareness is prevention.
Yours truly,
ChildLink Inc.
