Changing Attitudes to End Gender-Based Violence

Dear Editor,

“This trend must be a wake-up call for all of us in the region, men and women,” said United Nations Economic Commission for Europe Executive Secretary and International Gender Champion, Tatiana Molcean. “Changing attitudes is fundamental for preventing gender-based violence against women. A society in which such violence is accepted is one in which it can more readily occur.”

Her words ring painfully true in Guyana, where too many women’s names become headlines only after tragedy strikes. Behind every headline is a family shattered, child/ children left motherless, and communities asking how it came to this.

Think of the woman who wakes up each morning in Georgetown with a knot in her stomach, wondering what will set her partner off today. She carefully chooses her words, silences her own needs, and hides bruises beneath her long sleeves. To outsiders, she might look “fine,” but inside, fear has become her daily companion.

Or picture the little girl who overhears her mother crying behind a locked bedroom door. She is too young to understand all the details, but she is old enough to know that violence is wrong. That child grows up carrying unspoken trauma, and unless cycles are broken, she may either endure abuse as normal or repeat it when she is older.

These are not isolated cases, they are snapshots of a wider reality that many of us know exists but prefer not to confront. Molcean’s call to change attitudes is urgent because violence thrives where it is normalized. Too often in Guyana, harmful phrases like “he only hits you because he loves you” or “marriage is for better or worse” are used to excuse abuse. Communities sometimes pressure women to stay in unsafe relationships “for the children,” ignoring that children raised in violent homes are among the most deeply affected.

When we laugh at sexist jokes, dismiss harassment as “boys being boys,” or advise survivors to “keep family matters private,” we reinforce the very attitudes that give violence permission to flourish.

Guyana has made progress in strengthening laws against domestic and sexual violence, and support services such as hotlines and shelters have expanded. But the sad truth is that legislation alone cannot prevent family violence, support survivors, heal wounds or change mindsets.

A law cannot teach a boy that respect – not control – defines manhood. A law cannot give courage to a woman who has been taught from childhood to stay silent. And a law cannot erase the stigma a survivor feels when her community whispers that she “brought it on herself.”
This is why Molcean emphasizes attitudes. Without changing harmful social norms – and, in turn, changing hearts, mindset and behaviours – even the strongest laws risk becoming paper shields against real human suffering.

Silence and acceptance of violence are some of our greatest enemies. Too many women fear that if they speak out, they will not be believed – or worse, that they will be blamed. Families, sometimes out of shame, pressure victims to keep quiet and many suffer until they are publicly murdered. 

Too often, the conversation around gender-based violence is framed as “a women’s issue.” But violence against women is not created by women, it is overwhelmingly committed by men.
This does not mean all men are abusers. In fact, many men are deeply disturbed by gender-based violence. They read the headlines, shake their heads, and whisper, “What a shame.” Yet too many stop there – remaining silent, and silence allows harmful norms to survive. Imagine the difference if every father taught his son that real strength is shown in patience, in logics, in accountability, in respect not fists. If every brother reminded his sister that she deserves respect, always. If more community leaders used their influence to show boys and men that love is never expressed through harm but through protection. 

If violence continues to be tolerated, more women will die, more children will suffer, more families will be broken. Children will be orphaned, exposed to trauma, forced to witness violence and murder, left without adequate parental care. Will we keep looking away, or will we finally choose change?

Yours sincerely,

ChildLinK Inc.