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Home Columns Mark’s Take

Covid-19 Blame Allocators

Staff Reporter by Staff Reporter
November 21, 2021
in Mark’s Take
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Prominently emblazoned it was, on President Harry Truman’s White House office desk-THE BUCK STOPS HERE. Where the buck spoken of wasn’t monetary, for that wasn’t him and it was responsibility; ultimate responsibility.

Chief Blame allocator
For singular it’s, albeit of many mortal variants, the invisible enemy in a pandemic of acronym Covid-19. Hitherto, amongst us it dwells, resident in untold respiratory trees, for upwards of 2 years and 5 millions deaths. And novel it is, of translation new, thus mistakes and regrets are a burden on most leaders. But of 195, PPP is the solitary exception, where Dr. Anthony occupies the throne as the ceremonial Chief Covid-19 Blame Allocator.

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In fact, as we live and die in this paralytic pandemic, the Chief Blame Allocator has taken on the neoteric persona, of a red cloak echolalic parrot. For his unmistakable incessant chirps of Covid-19 deaths being comorbidity driven, have surely pained our ears and perplexed our minds. But us rationals not ladened with anencephalic lightheadedness, have longed solved his insolvable, in mitigating the comorbidity demise. For not being abominably boneheaded, we’ve deductively concluded that the unapproved vaccines and burdensome comorbidity, are the weakest links in our life armour. Thus, with such eureka recognition, we the impressively unblinded have given voice to the reinforcement of the weakest links, with an additional/booster dose of a mRNA. But the Chief Blame Allocator, of visual and auditory incapacitations, went protractedly uninformed thus unreformed, for which a braille copy of evidence and recommendations are in-hand, for tactile sensing and ultimately enacting.

Clueless-1
And having endured such never before experienced vacuity, cephalagy was crippling, for which amelioration was sought in a sunless environ. Then of a transitory doze, an unwelcome and interruptive eyeopener presented, in the image of Priya Manickchand. For beseeching to see or be seen were her demands, even as she regurgitated environmentally unfriendly hogwash. Thus obvious it was, evidenced by the voluminous emesis, that the Clueless-1 was noncompliant with her antiemetics. In fact, a doctor of 21yrs stethoscope experience, this bilious emesis was a first, “Manickchand ties decline in CSEC pass rates to Covid-19 pandemic.”

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But being of the stratum Covid Clevers, we’ve longed recognised the dunderheaded depth, of the Clueless-1 fantastical foolery. Thus anonymous voting was had, delivering me the inevitable responsibility, to disinfect the Clueless-1 foul emesis. But paramount was social distancing, where the rod wasn’t spared in relaying a reward star to the Clueless-1, for recognising that Covid-19 can negatively impact examination performances. However, that was her only carrot, for subsequent pronouncements had many startled.

For predating August 2020, the Clueless-1 commendably recognised the negative correlation between Covid-19 and education. Thus, if she was with thinking hat, the rational next step would’ve been pandemic mitigations to minimise the duration of schools closure. But even further, if thinking hat was stimulating an underlying brain, reopening schools would’ve been her priority, where reducing Covid-19 transmissions would’ve taken precedence. And here’s the rational, schools reopening is associated with increase infection rates, which if of a pre-opening high baseline, will overwhelm our hospitals.

Repercussions
But that wasn’t the thinking of the PPP Clueless Many, for their jumbie science informed the rushed APNU+AFC lockdown relaxation, reopening of airports, bars, brothels, hotels, even as they outlawed quarantining, isolation, social distancing, crowd avoidance and face mask. And the consequences we saw and felt, infections, hospitalisations and deaths uncontrollably spiralled, even as our children bemoaned, being unschooled is uncool.

But the rationals amongst us provided the PPP an out clause, in recommending an urgent review of their virus proliferating interventions, but rejection we saw. As a consequence, infections, hospitalisations and deaths skyrocketed, as school closure months registered 1, 2, 3…..6…..12…..18…..Thus, schools they glued tighter than a Kim Kardashian girdle, while our children’s brains lockdown vis-a-vis education hysteresis, intensive and extensive margins.

So burdened with education hysteresis, intensive and extensive educational margins among other Covid-19 maladies, our children were bundled into the Covid-19 examination rooms, where inevitable failure awaited. In fact, 500+ likely climate change Activist, recognising the futility of the excercise, remained in bed, and in so doing saved paper, trees and the environment.

Thus it angers to hear the Clueless-1 blame Covid-19 for our children’s poor CSEC performance, provoking us to demand explanations, why we can’t have public floggings like the Talibans? For under her watch or rather deep sleep, our children were denied schooling for 18+ months, yet foolishly this PPP Blame Allocator blames, an invisible virus.

But even as we illuminate the Clueless-1 foolery, the Chief Blame Allocator isn’t beyond reproach. For he too ran from Covid-19 responsibility like if it were a sweet woman’s embarrassing pregnancy. In fact, he shamelessly blame allocated to ants, bats, minibus drivers, unvaccinated, dogs, slack public, cats, comordities and long list of excuses like a philanderer caught in the act by his wife.

Mathemagics
But the Clueless-1 must be revisited, since her foolery is of no foreseeable conclusion. For a mediocre lawyer, she is. Mediocre stewardship of the Education Ministry we see, with many bemoaning the burdensome mediocrity she shoulders. But far from burdensome are they, with her mathematics transitioning mathemagics.

For September 2020, the Covid-19 average monthly deaths was 5, in which the Clueless-1 proclaimed it too Afghan dangerous, to reopen schools. But come September 2021, with an average of 70 deaths per month, she deemed schools safer than the White House. Thus inquisition is ours, what gibberish dunderheaded, mathemagic calculations had she employed to make 70 less than 5?

But even as we reflect on this unprecedented level of foolery, the Bungler in Chief demonstrated more of her unmissable Phd mathemagics.

For the incubation period of Covid-19, mostly asymptomatic in children, is approximately fourteen days, which in the context of our schools’ open plan, will facilitate easy transmission. Further, there aren’t restrictions on child-child interaction ie no social bubbles. Then the water-pipes aren’t social distanced, serving as a gathering point for Covid-19.

Therefore, with a Covid-19 positive child and those set of circumstances, the presumption has to be that all, including the leptospirosis laden rodents were exposed, hence must quarantine for 10 days. Thus, we query of the Clueless-1, what’s the rationale underpinning schools two days mosquito fumigation, after which our children are packed in, like sacks of potatoes? Certainly, this 2=10 Phd mathemagics, is way above our heads.

But this the rationale. On foolhardy reopening school, 17+ were Covid-19 closed, in the first week. For this bruised the Clueless-1 ego, thus no further school closures she decreed, even if visited by the bubonic plague. And for her fatalistic foolery, there’re now ginormous spikes of children infected and hospitalised, with Covid-19.

Our conclusion
Thus this our inescapable conclusion. Incompetent they’re. Excuses we hear. Blame allocation is all we see. Responsibility they loathe. Accountability aborted. Certainly, not of the mantra, “The buck stops here.” For any buck ever stopping at their desk, wouldn’t be responsibility, but more likely bribe.



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