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And after one year of political fornication, the sinners duly made the sacred political vow. But unsurprisingly, this union wasn’t borne out of love, rather it was one of convenience. For to many, their age disparity is unacceptably wider than the Amazon river. His dated to Guysuco last profit; over five decades for the inquisitorial. Hers a youthful Generation Z; two decades. But in her eyes, age is but a number, for omnipotent is he.

Indeed, the matrimonial ceremony, conducted in a prototype minibus overloaded GECOM church, was uniquely officiated by a retired Judge. Thereafter, the Freedom House twilight celebrations was one for the oscars, with each dramatist performing their script to perfection.

The honeymoon was thankfully private and within months she was with child. Nonetheless, parturition was upon her sooner than anticipated, but her dutiful handmaids surely made it less perilous. Then one final groan brought the newborn into our world.

With that the foot-soldier made it to the Palace entrance, wherefore the Royal birth was announced. “Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. PPP and Mrs. Minion Parties have been blessed with child, Master Quintet of Quacks. And that announcement was welcomed by all, moreso the democracy fighters and ballot-box guardians.

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But the years, brought out Quintet of Quacks abysmal academic failures. For his tutor’s nightmarish Covid management report reads “Despite demotion to the toddler-level class of dunces, Quintet of Quacks remained the perennial dunce of dunces.This performance, or lack thereof is nothing short of a national tragedy considering the par excellence performance of his predecessor, APNU+AFC.”

Covaxin

And like volcanic ash, news of Quintet of Quacks abysmal performance blackened the Caribbean skies and Guyanese mood. But this was no more evident than in the simple charge of sponging Covid vaccines which brought to the fore their staggering ineptitude. In fact, with the Chinese donated SinoPharm, the elementary task of visualising data turned out to be herculean. But haven’t learn from their SinoPharm debacle, blindly they sauntered into a COVAX fiasco, where desperately needed Oxford-AstraZeneca vaccines doses were astonishingly slashed from 104,000 to a humiliating 24,000.

But 500,000 doses of India’s Covaxin did temporarily provide a glimmer of hope for their catastrophic vaccination programme. For Covaxin, endorsed by the party of red as the vaccine to end our spiralling Covid deaths, came with Egyptian throne conveyance. But the dark of night transformed the ceremonies to ignominious, Ali Baba and the forty thieves, celebrations. Wherefore, driven by an adrenaline frenzy, their infectious foolery quickly climaxed to pandemic levels, as expensive taxpayers wines settled on floors rather than in stomachs. And pervasive in this gyrating Sodom and Gomorrah euphoria, were explosive back-slapping which many drivers mistook for tyre blowouts.Then by the hilarious happy-hour, Freedom House was beyond hotter than the St.Vincent volcano and tumultuous than gnashing teeth in hell.

But amidst their spiritous frolic, a clever doctor did what the Quintet of Quacks failed to do-Researched Covaxin! For five minutes of research did unearth enough explosive evidence, to fill an Osama Bin Laden cave. And this incendiary literary compilation was aptly labelled “Government could have procured our vaccines but chose to beg.”

Then at the break of dawn, the bleary eyed, anencephalic and cretinous revellers, awakened with thunderclap headache, sniffed out the literary masterpiece, like cocaine canines. And like dry sponges, their vertiginous brains absorbed every word targeted to cause them, more embarrassment than that of miniskirt Duchess, on a very windy day. For the conclusion, sealed the fate of Covaxin; buried in unmarked graves.

But inevitably, their failed grade was WHO appealed, in characteristic shameless hormonal moaning of rich countries stealing our vaccines, they never procured. But agonisingly, we now live but mostly die with the consequences of their incompetence. For PAHO recently announced that deaths are variants related, even as PPP redoubled efforts on the Sugar Industry, wasting a further $200 million to provide pay increases to workers, who sleep most of the working day. But worse visited us, counting 293 deaths and 12, 963 cases, which led the Americans to placed us on their unwelcome Covid blacklist. The British, risk averse with their recently widowed Monarch, red-listed us to Covid arm-length while the Canadians, who once kept him out, now visit us with similar persona non grata restrictions. But as PPP horror show plays out, our Caricom brothers and sisters have replaced our usual airports benches with barricades.

TCI 

And with a befuddled Quintet of Quacks, The TCI rushed to fill the Covid vacuum by proclaiming “TCI urges the return of the 6am-6pm curfew.”

But despite efforts, their unintelligent language paralytically argued for both a 6am-6pm curfew and lockdown, reflecting a confused non-thinking cerebral cortex, conflating the terminologies. Indeed, this 12hr curfew misleadingly implies that the virus is somnolent, as the masses maximise their permits to crowd the streets. But in reality, by 6pm the streets are Jonestown empty anyway, as the citizenry fearful of the spiralling crime nightmare, lock themselves in their homes. But their list of witless recommendations know no end, as foolishly they highlighted Covid numbers, suggesting that the daily addition of three is beyond our academic abilities. But inescapable in their diatribe were terms like mask mandate, crowd restrictions and penalties of $50,000 which from their superficial exploration, suggest a google scavenge without the adult semantics comprehension. For their full-beam ignorance, surely blinded realisation that Covid enforcements would be illegal without supporting time-limited laws.

But astoundingly, vaccines that should have been expounded on, was brainlessly ignored, leaving all and sundry to assume that the lockdown masses will have antibodies delivered to their homes, by DHL. But TCI letter is far from coincidental since for months I’ve been highlighting PPP mismanagement of Covid even as I proffer recommendations. And with increasing deaths, I admonished the minions parties, who viciously attacked APNU+AFC Covid management, on their silence in PPP Covid catastrophe. Then within days of spotlighting their hypocrisy,TCI presented a poorly thought-out list of recommendations. For their below par narration is symptomatic of plummeting standards, a direct consequence of absent academic contributions from their sagacious Noble Laureate, University dropout and bastion of political principles.

Recommendations

But Trinidad with twice our population has half our deaths and despite this, they see Covid as a deadly threat hence ring-fencing the entire island with Covid chastity belts, sending the unambiguous message that Covid isn’t reproducing here. Sadly, this is beyond these intellectually barren halfwits, mandating drastic actions.

1. Disband the PPP-NCTF, relegating them to Directors of Burial to mitigate any damage they may cause the living.

2. Appoint former PM, Mr. Nagamottoo to lead the new NCTF.

3. Have an emergency budget to release funds to aggressively tackle Covid.

4. Enact laws to support enforcement of Covid Public Health Practices.

NCM

Finally, the many crises, inclusive of Covid, mandate a NCM; for in short-time they have generated a long list.

  1. The economy is stagnated.

    2. Skyrocketing crime, evident by the Palm Court assassination of Roger Khan right-hand man, eerily similar to my QC buddy, Devendra Persaud.

    3. The police are back in Derek Chauvin mode.

    4. Discriminations, victimisations and dismissals letters are selectively placed on the workstations of supposedly, APNU+AFC supporters.
    (The views expressed in this article are not necessarily that of the Village Voice News)



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